Slow Down * Enjoy Life

This is an ongoing post that I’ve been adding to for a while.  Figured I would post it now and continue to add to it.

Momma & Dadda have been there for a while.  He calls grandma Mom & Momma.  When he wants out of his crib he screams one or a combination of the above.

Then came Ball & Lala (lolo).  We were at Target and he saw the big red balls outside and keeps saying Baaaaall

And now there’s a bunch (1 or two every day) … Ti Ti, Nukie, Bobby (sort of)

The other day (8/28) we think he said Maddie

He’s been saying Yesssss and Juice for a while now

New words include Pillow, Down, Up (10/1)

This week (10/5) he hummed the whole twinkle twinkle little star song.  Instead of words … Ya Ya Ya Ya Ya Ya Yaaa (and so on).  Close enough 😉

He’s using Grandma instead of mama & mom a little more.

His new word is “No”.  Oh great! (10/20)

I’ve been having some conversations that have forced me to revisit a lot of things that I, for numerous reasons, avoid thinking about.

One of the most difficult, as I found out yesterday, were those voice mails left on Cari’s phone by a couple people the day everything happened.  I could barely speak about them.  So sad 🙁

These coversations have mainly been about our lives ever since.  But then I think, how could I possibly paint a picture of the past 17 months in a few hours?  I can’t.

I write on this blog, but the blog only captures a fraction of our lives.  The posts are sporatic.  The stories normally out of context.  But I’ve put a lot of time into this thing.  So I suppose it does tell part of a story … or a whole lot of mini-stories.

17 months …

So much has changed … in the blink of an eye.  Today is 3 years since Papa passed away.  3 years … ugh!

The decision to leave my job was a complicated one.  However, a small part of it did have to do with how fast things were happening and how important it is for me to be involved in it.   Not sure how the $ situation is going to work out but at least I’m able to be around for the kids now.

Beyond all that, though, there’s one thing that really hasn’t been discussed.  All that talk makes me think about this thing.  And it’s really something that does deserve focus.  It’s not just about us figuring things out, getting through the day, LIVING… it’s about that unreplaceable thing that was stolen from the lives of our children. It’s the experiences, the love, the relationships the days, hours, minutes, seconds that can never be given back, can never be replaced. 

We were at the zoo tonight and at one point a women at a craft station was talking to the kids and said “maybe your mommy can help you out with this.”  A month or so ago a lady at the Disney Store said something similar to the kids.  Why would someone ever expect children so young to be in such an unfortunate situation?  Why can’t we just avoid the topic?  It blindsides us.  It comes out of nowhere.  What are we going to do?  Maybe we can wear a sign.

Her first tooth came in right before her 1st birthday, 1/24.

His first tooth came in 5 months earlier, 8/17, at roughly 7 months

It took her a year and 4 months more to get everything but her 2nd year molars.  She was about 27 months.

It took him a year and 2 months more to get everything but his 2nd year molars.  He was about 20 months.

It took her until roughly 39 months to get all of her teeth … wonder how long it will take him to get all of his.

For a 3yr old, about 44 months old, I think this is pretty good.

She didn’t need any guidance … did this completely on her own. 

This is mommy with a flower on her shirt, flowers around her, along with their names and a heart for mommy.

That one was from 10/2/10.  This one was from about a year ago, 12/2/09.  This one was a picture of daddy.

I’ve been waiting a few days to post this.  My internet has been out most of the week but finally seems to be fixed.

Our nighttime routine is pretty consistent unless one or the other falls asleep in the car.

They sleep in separate rooms, which I can see changing at some point in the future but for now it’s working so why change it. 

I put him down first and then her.  Most times he’ll go down without a fight but every few days he’ll either want to stay up for a few more minutes or will just want me to rock him.  I know the days of him wanting me to hold and rock him will soon be over so I try to take in as much as I can.  I wish I could just bottle up the moment so that I can relive it over and over.  It’s super cute, but that’s not why I’m writing.

Her routine is a little more time consuming.  Potty, brush our teeth, read a few books, and prayers.  We always read a couple books, sometimes three.  Some of those books are pretty long so I try to push for the shorter ones.  We read the first, then say some prayers, then read the 2nd and sometimes that 3rd.  Similar to him I wish I could just bottle up these moments so I can relive them whenever I want.  This night was a little different.  I think it was this past Tuesday.  It’s not always easy to leave her room when I’m done reading.  Most times she wants me to stay and sleep with her.  Every now and then she gets her way…surprise 🙂  Usually I have to tell her I’ll be back, that I have some work to do or the dog needs to go out or that lil guy is crying.  This night, however, I finished reading the second book and began to make my way out.  When I turned to say something to her she was sound asleep.  Somewhere during those few minutes she closed her eyes and that was it.  That was a new first.  So precious!