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March, 2016:

A phone call

If ages 7 & 9 are this challenging I cannot imagine what the years to come will be like …

Maybe it has a lot to do with being relatively stuck inside for the past few months?  Chicago winters … ugh

I’m sure there are all sorts of factors

I’ve talked to lots of parents and we’re not all that different

Bickering back and forth, pushing each other’s buttons, it seems to be more the norm than not

I love them tons.  I just want them to be nice to each other.  I’m sure we’ll figure this out but … sigh, this is exhausting


We took a Caribbean vacation in Feb this year

It was so needed

And everyone loved it

And I want to go back for an extended period of time

Like forever!


I could wake up to that every morning…

Amazing view.  Coffee in hand.  Warm breeze.  If every morning were like that …

So what else … fresh fish & lobster, hours in the pool, amazing weather (even with a brief shower every day), remote beaches, adult beverages, shirley temples, snorkeling, splashing in the waves, friends, swimming with dolphins, trip to the pharmacy, even found some ramen noodles, chicken nuggets nearly every day …

I’m glad we did this.  Truly.  And I really can’t wait to do it again.  Just need to find a way to make it happen $$$$


Doing this parenting thing on my own is far from simple

Not that I need or want someone to do it with

I mean that’d be great

But it’s such a full time job in itself

Planning, Prepping, Executing, Recovering, Resting???, and doing it over and over again without a break

And then trying to hold a “real” full time job at the same time

I’m crazy to think I can handle all this, crazy!

Maybe there’s a light at the end of this tunnel, I just hope it comes soon


Every so often I have a dream with Cari in it

Yesterday it happened again

Maybe that’s why I’m writing

It’s also Easter in like 12 minutes

She’s so excited.  They both are.  He came out of his bed and surprised me at like 9:15p thinking the sound he heard was the Easter Bunny.  Thank goodness it wasn’t!  Phew.  She was excited in the car saying “The Easter Bunny is coming tonight!”.  I really love moments like this.

Anyways, she was in my dream

For maybe the first time ever it wasn’t a dream where we were fighting

Usually it’s some sort of fight, and a serious one, probably due to some unresolved issue :-/

But this one wasn’t anything like that

This one was crazy emotional

Like I was seriously crying in my dream

I picked up a phone and called a number, thinking she’d be on the other end

The first time no one answered

Then the second time she did

And we talked for all of a few seconds but we really talked

It was crazy

I was completely choked up and think I woke up crying

It was so real and so crazy

It sucked that I woke up right then but I’ll take it

Man … Even now it feels like it was so real …

Anyways back to life … school … work and then seemingly endless list of kid activities current and upcoming …

– girl scouts
– cub scouts
– volleyball
– piano
– hip hop
– chess club
– fitness club
– hockey
– baseball
– soccer
– piano
– swimming
– gymnastics
– cooking class
– and the neverending request for play dates

is that it??  i’m sure there’s more