Defiance…it was a good movie but I should have been sleeping hours ago. Now I’m over tired. I really want to go to bed but my thoughts are all over the place. She’s ever present and my kids are right there with her.
Tonight was emotionally exhausting. I was tired before the LaGrange village meeting. I spoke for a few minutes about some safety items not addressed in the meeting. I’m not sure I accomplished quite what I wanted to but at least the topics were discussed. I can’t figure out if safety is a top priority of all board members. Even in this small town political agenda’s appear to be present. I’m not sure politics would ever be for me.
12 weeks today. It’s un-f*cking believable.
I did, however, receive some potentially positive news from an unexpected group of ladies. I helped launch their business but when contacted recently I unfortunately had to inform them of our loss. I was a mess telling the story because it’s an impossible story to tell. But they may be able to help. We’ll see. They did send a touching e-mail today and it sounds as though they might be able to help out my kids a bit. They’re my life so I’ll do anything for them.
My job…it seems like things are back to normal. Let’s just say, my skillset is barely utilized and more than not my efforts are less than productive. I’ve tried to make this evident many times in the past but some people just don’t get it. I’m thinking that maybe IT just isn’t the place for me. I’m pretty sick of staring at the computer all day long. It’s probably worse when you’re not 100% busy (or better yet 20% busy) with ‘real’ work. But where would I go? How could I possibly escape sitting in front of a computer? Real Estate? Maybe. That probably makes the most sense. But I really need a mentor. I don’t want to make more not-so-perfect decisions, so someone with experience would be very beneficial.